toothyhalcyon:

What I want to say to my favorite band member:  Hey, I think you should break up with your girlfriend so I can have your babies and we can love each other for ever and ever and you will only love me and no one else so I can go on your band bus and go on tour with you and hang out with you and the guys and hey, I can even do your laundry just let me love you.
Me:  Hi

ronaldteasley:

pinkrangerwasa:

binbons:

robgonemild:

your-nibs:

castiel-winchesterr:

mrsfigscats:

He pasta way.

we cannoli do so much

his legacy will become a pizza history.

here today, gone tomato

How sad that he ran out of thyme.

Sending olive my prayers to the family.

His wife is really upset. Cheese still not over it.

His family didn’t have a penne left after the funeral costs.

daisytakeabow:

sweatsmusicc0ffee:

anarchymydear:

oh my god i peed

omfg no this is too perf

1,104,659 plays

Holden Caulfield:  Hey I just met you
Holden Caulfield:  and this is crazy
Holden Caulfield:  but anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be.
Holden Caulfield:  so don't even call me, you're a phony

sodamnrelatable:

I think you breathe a little too much.